Friday, September 09, 2005

i gotta new drug

Classic rock stations, and I don't know why I didn't mention this before, should stop playing "When the Levee Breaks" by Led Zepplin. Good song. Not so good times. "Shelter from the Storm" by Bob Dylan is good to play.

If you were from the Isle of Man, what would you be called? Or, what are people from the Isle of Man called? Men? Manman? Manonian? Nope. All wrong. The answer, is Manx. Which is also the name of a little pub here in Ottawa on Elgin street. Good food, good beer, great selection of whiskey and scotch. Scotchy scotch scotch, here it goes down, down into my belly. I'd go as far as to say best selection of whiskey in town. The only bad thing about the place, the Manx, is one story I have about one of my many trips there.

I was going there one day to meet a few friends before heading somewhere else, and getting there about 10 minutes before a poetry reading started. Now, I don't mind poetry readings at all. Go culture! But when you have someplace else to go to, and people start reading their published poems, well, lets just say it was hard to find a discreet moment to exit. The Pub is also quaint in size, meaning that everyone knew that when after 20 minutes I went outside under the pretense of smoking, I was just trying to get out. It's not my fault, the poetry sucked. I'm sorry to those people who wrote/read it. I'm sure it had plenty of meaning for you, but to me, it sucked.

Friday morning quarterback. Patriots won 30-20 over the Raiders. I made a little 20 spot bet for the Patriots to cover the 7.5 spread. They did. Not a tough call, the Raiders are not a good team. Their d-line was manhandled by the Pat's O-line. Tom Brady had so much time in the pocket that by the 3rd quarter, the television cameras were zoomed in on his legs. They showed his legs delicately bouncing off the ground and calmly getting set to throw. That Matt Leinart kid, quarterback for an NCAA team in California, the USC Trojans, he's going to be a really good qb (really weird segue, but stick with me here).

"What makes you say that Hoss?"

Well, not only did Matt decide to not declare eligibility for the draft to finish off his edumacation, which shows where his head is, his major is....ballroom dancing. That's right. An NFL player forsook millions in dollars to finish his education in ballroom dancing. I didn't get it either until last night when they had a close up of Brady's legs dancing in the pocket. Smooth like a butterfly. And then it dawned on me. Leinart is a genius. The 49ers screwed up with Smith, they should have waited for Leinart next year.

You see, the universe has this way of presenting clues to life. Things that appear meaningless, I place them away in a meaningless file in my brain. Also, the clerk who has access to all my files, he pays attention to those meaningless things, he's sorta got a thing for that. Anyways, that clerk, he's the dude that comes in most handy. Because I'm slow and don't pick up on things, he takes everything and sorts it out. Sooner or later (or never) something comes up, and that meaningless file loving clerk accesses the file and bam. Why do I know that Matt Leinart is majoring in ballroom dancing? Because I'm an idiot savant renaissance man.

On that note.


Jordan said...

so what happened at the manx? did you get out? did they throw their barrets at you? do you want insurance?

Hossim said...

I got out. My friends did not. I was outside and watched them try to pay for their meal at the bar. I went in after the last reading and paid.
I am interested in insurance. Do you have any in the life area?