Thursday, March 23, 2006

brokeback hockey

Caution: This clip has partial male-male nudity, as Pavel Datsyuk is seen undressing Tomas Vokoun last night in Detroit during the shootout.



Tomorrow night we come to you live, from Montreal and the Bell Centre to tell you about the Leafs in their playoff hunt.

As for the Ottawa Citizen, they are on a "death watch" for the Leafs. I wonder, is it a rivalry if only one side cares about it?

Wednesday, March 22, 2006

faulty camera in my mind

This is to tell you to go watch the video for Death Cab for Cutie's song What Sarah Said. Click here.
This link will be useless in 5 days (March 27).
Go, listen, watch. Google the French.

Here's a swan.

AFP/Valentina Petrova

Tuesday, March 21, 2006

blogger trap

I've fallen into it, but I just read something that I can't ignore. ESPN is one of the major player's in sports media (if not the major) and recently has done a few things to tarnish its own reputation. Last night, on ESPN, they had a love in with Drew Rosenhaus. I caught a clip from espn.com, but Eric McErlain watched the whole thing and has a better take.

Today is a different day, and under a different light I read this courtesy of ESPN Page 2's Dan Shanoff in his Daily Quickie:


T.O.-nanism": Fans who gratify themselves over their team's signing of a player who, just days before, was one of the most loathed opponents in franchise history.

It must be a banner day for personal-injury lawyers in Dallas, what with all the whiplash cases from fans who used to hate T.O. now lined up begging for him to preen on the Cowboys' midfield star.

"But he's our jerk" is the simple explanation, and it has become one of the most basic laws of sports fandom. Here are a couple other recent examples:

Kings fans: Ron Artest
Mets fans: Carlos Delgado
Eagles fans: Terrell Owens

The corollary? "Damonizing": Fans who flip-flop on players who as recently as last season were heroes, until they jumped ship to another team. Let the boos rain.

Meanwhile, T.O. is coming out with a tell-all book in July sure to dis his ex-Eagles teammates. Who had 48 hours as the over/under of the point when Bill Parcells regrets signing him. Enjoy that mini-camp, Coach!

(Do the optimistic/naive 46 percent of fans who voted in SN that they think T.O. and Tuna can peacefully coexist want to change their vote?)


So. Carlos Delgado is a jerk? I fired off a quick letter in response.
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I used to read your daily quickie very frequently. However, by lumping Carlos Delgado as a "jerk" alongside Ron Artest and Terrell Owens, I am ashamed for you. This is a tragic piece of journalism, considering one of your peers on page 2 wrote an article on the rights of an individual to quietly protest (emphasis on the quiet part, it took someone going "hey, what's he doing? Look at this guy over here, hey everybody, look at this guy over here" for people to notice), and then we have you calling him a "jerk" for doing so. If he has done anything else to warrant that label from you, it is beyond me. From where I stand Carlos Delgado is one of the finest individuals in sports today (if you had any idea what he does for Puerto Rico you would be ashamed of yourself). America should be proud to have Carlos Delgado as one of its citizens.

God Bless Carlos Delgado.
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Just so you know, Carlos Delgado chooses to stand along side his teammates during the seventh inning break for God Bless America, because he was quietly protesting, and he realized that his choice had become not quiet and instead had become a distraction to the team.

I leave you with this thought; Dan Shanoff is a.....

Parochialism n : the quality or state of being parochial; especially : selfish pettiness or narrowness (as of interests, opinions, or views)

Monday, March 20, 2006

taste the cookies

I don't know why, but for some reason in class this morning, when my stats prof started using an example about 'tasting the cookies' I couldn't help but chuckle. Maybe it was the 8:30am Mondayness of the class. Maybe it was the lack of breakfast in my system. Maybe it was that something extra in the coffee, but every time he used a form of 'taste the cookies' (which he used often) my amusement grew. Finally, I had to put my head down and hide the uncontrollable laughter that stemmed from him stating that the purpose of the survey was 'to get customers to taste the cookies.'

Right now, I don't get it anymore. Did he even say 'taste the cookies'? Cuz that's not really funny. Maybe it was the repetition of it. I'm going to start using 'taste the cookies' as an analogy, and see how that works out. Analogy for what? I don't know, everything.

'It sure is cold outside.'
'Yeah, I can barely taste my cookies.'

'Leafs have a big game tonite'
'Oh man, they're gonna have to win if they wanna taste the cookies.'

'What size coffee can I get you?'
'I dunno, maybe it would be an easier decision if you let me taste your cookies.'

'Dude, hot chick, 3 o'clock.'
'I sure would like to taste her cookies.'

I can see it starting to get a tad sexual in use, but like all good slang phenomenons, it's all about tasting the cookies.

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Sharks weekend report.

Well, they came away with the 3 points out of the four games, leaving them 2 points behind Vancouver for eight spot, and the Sharks have 3 games in hand.

The Sharks could have got all four points, but the game against Dallas was weird. The first thing Dallas put in the San Jose net was a player, he was kinda large and he sorta distracted (read: knocked over the Toskala)(did I spell that one right kenny?), allowing the Dallas shooter to put the cookie in the taster. I think the second goal Dallas scored was weak as well, but whatever, can't win them all.

Up next for the Sharks this week, a mini road trip. Tuesday in St. Louis, Thursday in Detroit, Saturday in Minnesota, Sunday in Chicago.

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Matt's a guy, and he pointed me to this next link and I'm blatantly posting a link to it because it's one of the greatest things I've ever heard. Trading, start with one red paper clip, and see where it gets you. This man is a hero to some, and he started blogging after I did, or so it appears, and he's gotten way more out of it than I have. And by way more, I mean tangible objects, I've gotten plenty of internet love.

Coming up next week: Blogger groupies. Where are you? Seriously. I've even got a term coined, bloggeroupies. Not the most creative, but please come and taste my cookies.

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Last, but not least. Congrats to the 4-time reigning CIS Mens Basketball champions, one of them might even be in one of my classes (see groupies, I'm even giving away the location of my school), the Carleton Ravens. When asked how it felt to win again the guy on the right said 'damn, those cookies taste sweet!'

Saturday, March 18, 2006

you break my record, now i break you, like i break your friend

Proud papa that he is, and considerate husband too, Nils Ekman.

Left wing Nils Ekman practiced with his teammates Friday morning after missing Thursday's 5-2 victory over St. Louis so he could be with his wife, Johanna, for the birth of their first child. Mother and son, Melvin, were doing fine, but Ekman wasn't able to watch the Sharks because Fox Sports Net was not available in the hospital's maternity wing.

``I watched the baby channel and `Bloodsport,' '' Ekman said, referring to the 1988 Jean-Claude Van Damme movie. ``I watched it with no sound so I didn't disturb Johanna.'
' (David Pollack, The Mercury News).

So heading into a big weekend against Dallas today and Colorado tomorrow, the Sharks should try to come away with at least 2 points. Right now they're in tenth in the Western Conference, 3 points behind LA (in the eighth spot), with 3 games in hand. That doesn't factor in Anaheim, who is one point behind LA with one game in hand on LA. There are still too many games left to even begin to draw up first round match-ups in the NHL, so instead I present to you the Belgian Brawler.

Sharks have 18 games to play the rest of this season, with just over a month to go. That means a game at least every other day. The key is to stay healthy, with lots of energy, skate hard, play our game, try not to make the same mistakes that last period and come out strong the next one. And other cliched remarks.

One last thing, if you are a Sharks fan, and you happen to be around James Bay, and you happen to stop by Moose Factory, I advice you to share your feelings with someone there, more specifically, share your feelings about one Jonathan Cheechoo.

Joe Thornton. There, I managed to mention the Sharks whole first line in this post. And last week I got Nieminen, McCauley in Goc in one. Coming up next, Bernier, Marleau and Michalek and their impact on 21st century relations between North and South Korea, more specifically how that line managed to get the two countries to submit one team into the next World Cup of Soccer and why the Czech Republic and Slovakia should not follow suit in hockey (because they would win everything)(also, those countries very different from Korea in terms of political history, I'm just saying that a hockey team combining those two countries would seriously kick ass today, and that it's not so far fetched because at one point recently they would have been under one flag).


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umm... tv kills. . yeah. that's all that really can be said about that.

Sunday, March 12, 2006

sing with me

Music/sports video. Made by Pierre-Olivier Doyon. Music, Aerosmith, song, Dream on. Artist, Alexander Ovechkin.

crazy love child

With their win over Nashville last night, Sharks now sit 5 points behind Edmonton with 2 games in hand, and 7 points behind Vancouver with 3 games in hand. The Ducks are sitting in 9th, with the same amount of games played as the Sharks but 3 more points on the year.

For a full report on the game, I suggest you go here to Sharkspage.

Instead of recapping the fight filled game, I borrow a sketch from Conan O'Brien. Ladies and Gentlemen, I present to you, the love child of Todd Bertuzzi and Chris Chelios......Keith Carney.

Saturday, March 11, 2006

Alexander the Eight

Alexander Ovechkin. Overtime, March 10 2006 against the New Jersey Devils.
Your mission, Mr. Ovechkin, should you choose to accept it, is a search and destroy. Here are your targets (note: some targets are duplicated to ensure elimination); White, Martin, Martin, White.



Gawd, what I would do to see this kid play in the playoffs. Hurry up and get good Washington.

Friday, March 10, 2006

he's baaaaack

You think Doug Wilson has a short memory? This guy helped to kill the Sharks two years ago in the Western Conference Finals. Aquired from the Rangers for a 3rd round draft pick this year; in his first game in a Sharks uniform he tied for the team lead in hits. Ville Nieminen, welcome to the Western Conference playoff race. He started the game on the fourth line with McCauley and Parker, played more in the second, even replacing Ekman on the top line with J. Thornton and Cheechoo, and finished the game back with McCauley and Goc.

Oh yeah, San Jose won in regulation over Edmonton, 5-2. Edmonton had their new keeper in net and from the looks of things it wasn't as bad as the score appears. It was 2-2 heading into the third, but then San Jose decided to get some goals.

With 21 games to play (and two games in hand) the Sharks sit 10th in the conference and 6 points back of Edmonton. Edmonton made some of the biggest moves at the deadline, and with Vancouver going out and aquiring a NHL caliber defence core, it's tough to see who will drop out of the playoffs. Most likely result is that San Jose is going to have to earn that playoff spot by playing hard hitting hockey like they did last night.

Up next for the Sharks are the Nashville Predators, for an afternoon tilt on Saturday. Needless to say, for some teams on the outside looking in right now (i.e. Leafs, Sharks) the playoffs have started now.

On a personal note, I didn't hear a thing about Nieminen all year from New York and am interested to see what John Davidson has to say (if anything) about this trade this Saturday Night on the Satellite Hotstove. My feeling is that John Davidson is probably the best hockey mind on American television (he could be a GM), and as a reporter with the Rangers, he will have some good insight on possibly why the Rangers would part with such a key playoff performer in exchange for draft picks when they're in the playoffs themselves right now.

Wednesday, March 08, 2006

sharks report

Anaheim is just one team the San Jose Sharks have to leap frog to make the playoffs

(AP Photo/Francis Specker)

There was a big game in the western conference tonite. I'm following the Sharks really closely from here on in till the end of the season. Here are my top ten reasons (not that I really need any) for doing it (in no particular order):
1)Had they not lost Sturm with a broken leg, they might have beat the Flames and made the Stanley Cup final against the Lightning a few years ago. Although I made tons of dough by betting on the Flames to win the Conference that year. I have a gambling problem when I lose, tons of friends when i win. Well, no, actually my friends tell me I get big headed when I win. It's a lose-lose situation I guess.
2)I got long odds on the Sharks winning the Western Conference, and if they make the playoffs it could be interesting.
3)I'm a Leaf fan, and although they did win tonite, I find that I can't objectively report on them and also I only get to really watch them on Saturday nights.
4)Sharks are a west-coast team and I usually don't go to bed early and I don't mind listening to the streaming audio of the games from nhl.com. I was listening tonite and the announcers were truly upset at the fact that they lost in overtime. "Nabakov makes the save, OH NO! Marleau put it into his own net." Not completely homers (although a few more listens will give a better analysis of that) but more along the lines of announcers truly caring for their team.
5)I've read somewhere that Neil Young has season tickets to them, and if they're good enough for Neil Young, then they're sure as hell good enough for me.
6)I'd like to see Joe Thornton do well. I find it intriguing that the top two picks from one draft year are playing on the same team (Marleau 1997).
7)This guy is probably better equipped than me to do it, but I have no problems finishing 5th in a race of 3.
8)I really hate studying for stats, but I really love reading baseball stats.
9)My xbox broke, and I've got time to kill.
10)I may have been wrong about the WBC being crappy, and even though MLB.tv won't let me watch the games that i've subscribed to (a pox on them until they fix my problem, I'm sure I'm high on their list of priorities. crap) I would like to be wrong more. It humbles me. Please, feel free to comment on my inadequacies.

So anyways. The Sharks lost a big game on the road, but they came away with a point. But now they go home for a 6 game homestand including two big games against teams they are chasing. Thursday Edmonton comes into town and Monday the Kings roll into town. I'll have more of an extensive report on Thursday.

Tuesday, March 07, 2006

time sucking machine

i mean, it's not like you ordered a game from ea sports online and waited with baited breath until it got shipped and then were so excited when you started to play that you played all day the first day you got it and then some more the next day and you noticed that the game was choppy, but didn't think much of it, and by the third day your xbox decided to stop fucking working so now you're like a lost puppy wandering around wondering where home is because you have no home without your xbox and your new favourite baseball game is no more and so instead you surf the internet googling "why?" and "what did i do to deserve this?" and then you realize that there's nothing you can do because you have a modded xbox and it was ironic that a game that you bought legally would bring it to its knees and then you google "ironic" and curse the bitch that is alanis, and then you decide to download songs illegally because the straight and narrow got you nowhere and take out your frustration on anything and everything you can find all the time wondering, hoping, that life isn't all that ironic and perhaps it would be nice that you have all this time that you would have spent playing the brand new video game that you waited 2 weeks for to come in the mail and you felt like it was christmas when it did come and now you think that all that time waiting, anticipating, amounted to 2 days of fun and perhaps its time to get out of the house and deal with actual people and maybe you should try to see a sunset again because those things used to be nice.
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a good time as any for a Radiohead video. the acoustic version of creep done by low morale.

and we'll see you tomorrow night


Kirby Puckett. 1960-2006


my Mom's favourite baseball player.

Monday, March 06, 2006

messin' around with the interweb

ok, so the audio isn't the greatest but here's hoping that this works.
a video of wolf parade, live, playing the song i'll believe in anything.



that was fun, I might have to start making my own mix videos of songs and sports highlights. Speaking of sports.
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Here are some reasons why the World Baseball Classic will most likely not be as good as hyped.

1. Rules involving pitchers are as follows, a pitcher must:
-have at least four days rest after an outing of 50 or more pitches
-have at least one day of rest after an outing of 30-49 pitches
-have at least one day of rest after consecutive innings
Pitchers must also throw no more than:
-65 pitches per game in round one of the tournament;
-80 pitches per game in round two of the tournament; and
-95 pitches per game in the Semifinal and Final of the tournament.
-A pitcher may exceed the maximum per-game limits in order to complete a batter's plate appearance.
-If a pitcher is within 20 pitches of a prescribed limit at the beginning of an inning, the Game Operations Technical Committee will inform the head umpire, both managers and the ballpark public address announcer. The technical committee will immediately notify the head umpire when a pitcher has reached his limit set forth in the rules (which includes finishing a batter's plate appearance, if necessary). At that point the head umpire will inform the pitcher's manager who must remove the pitcher from the game immediately.

2. What happens if a team ends up getting blown out and has to use up alot of pitches? No worries, there is a mercy rule.

3. Game Operations Techical Committee?

4. Classic already? The Fall Classic I can believe, but the March Classic? Can this really compete with the playoff pushes in NBA and NHL, not to mention the NCAA tournament?

Basically, with the schedule they have set up, a team will be able to use a pitcher once in each round, with relievers able to be used more frequently, which isn't all that dissimilar from the regular season. However, and this has been done to death, the timing of this tournament sucks ass. Players, especially pitchers, are in no-way ready for full game intensity. Plus the other major sports are in full swing. Most likely the WBC will be a hit in every country except Canada, South Africa, U.S.A., Netherlands, Australia, and Italy.

Maybe baseball should copy the NHL and break for Olympics <-- That's a joke. I'm not quite sure which of those two evils the baseball GM's would prefer.

Sunday, March 05, 2006

man down

Missed 27 games trying not to have surgery on his wrist. If he had it he'd be back by now. Instead, he has to have surgery now, and is likely done for the season.

I know in Leaf nation this might be blasphemy, but thinking about this and the increasing possibility that the Leafs might not make the playoffs, I am reminded of the Coldplay song, Fix You.

When you try your best but you don't succeed
When you get what you want but not what you need
When you feel so tired but you can't sleep
Stuck in reverse

And the tears come streaming down your face
When you lose something you can't replace
When you love someone but it goes to waste
Could it be worse?

This next month could really suck.

Saturday, March 04, 2006

the sky is falling

Leafs fans on radio after losing to the Sabres had two major points.
1. Trade Sundin for major young superstar prospects.
2. Quinn should be fired. His fault and Olympics loss showed he is done as a coach.

Needless to say, I disagree with them.

How come no one has called in to comment on the sustained drop in price of chicken breasts? For the last month they've been running at sale prices at a few of the local grocery stores here in Ottawa, and my only conspiracy theory is that the if the bird flu virus hits, the farmers fear their stock of chicken will be worthless so they're getting rid of as many of them as quickly as possible.

I also think Felicity Huffman is going to win the Oscar for best female actress. Reasons being, she's a woman playing a man pretending to be a woman. Hilary Swank and Gwyneth Paltrow won for women playing men, I think Felicity just raised the bar. What did Reece Witherspoon play? The harpischord or something.

I should state that I have seen neither film, and am just judging based on those reasons and that I found 1:5 odds to bet on Felicity with (bet one, win 5) and only 4:5 on Reece. The other candidates aren't going to win. I hope.

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Why does Saturday Night live repeat sketches on new episodes?

Thursday, March 02, 2006

more for me than you

wake up.

finite time passing.

make a list of things to do with finite time. i.e. go to Wembley stadium and catch a concert/football match.

find the internal mental switch which creates that which puts me at ease.

learn to leave the past behind and put my head up to see the future.

learn how to see again. difference between looking and seeing. just because you look, doesn't mean you see.

Raptors lost to Atlanta at home in overtime. Forget playoffs, play for lottery now. Read a blog that was giving accolades to babcock for being like J.P. Riccardi of the Jays, saying that they both blew up the foundations. They did, the only difference was J.P. seemed to have a plan (i.e. stockpile arms in the minors) and you can't really stockpile youth as much in basketball so all babcock really did was blow up the team. I counted to ten, swore at the guy, and decided not to comment on his belief that babcock did anything noteworthy. It's not hard to dump salaries and contracts when there are people like isiah thomas out there.

what's really cool is being able to reach out in the dark and find a bottle of water. i was seeing something that I couldn't look for with my eyes.

I was hearing something that i couldn't believe was coming from my mouth.

I was reading a face on the street, a reflection of a lost soul wandering aimlessly through the shadows. It disappeared behind a street light and then the light went out.

i'm not overwhelmed, i'm underwhelmed and dauntless. the truth doesn't scare me because the truth is empty.

i study history, try to learn math. numbers and words. math has words, and words have numbers. only one number is spelled out in alphabetical order. forty.

i've lost the momentum for this evening.

Blessed are the forgetful, for they get the better even of their blunders.

Wednesday, March 01, 2006

questions

why am I still awake?

oh yes. the work thing. I suck at school work. Well, not really, I'm pretty good at it, but at 6 am I suck at it.

plural in the title, means more than one.

hmm..

i totally had something interesting to say and then as soon as i started writing it disappeared. never fear, as soon as i go into the shower next it will come back to me.

I just remembered.

in between the bowel movements that bookend this thing called life, what more can we really ask than for some laughter?

peace out Mr. Furley.




Don Knotts 6/24/24-2/28/06